Birthday Cake and Religion

Well, apparently we must be Jehovah Witnesses. I can’t come to any other explanation of why I didn’t get any additional gifts or recognition for my birthday. My research on the subject shows that this religion doesn’t recognize birthdays. For those of you just tuning in, I turned 6 on June 4th (mark that on your calendars for next year). Typically I am showered with gifts and treats (Pics of my last year’s celebration). This year nothing. My so called parents (a.k.a captors) didn’t even give me a happy birthday on Facebook. Everyone knows that if it is not acknowledged on Facebook, it didn’t really happen.

My captors defend their actions by claiming that my recent excursions to camp dip into my ‘gift fund’. Really?? I ask. I didn’t even know there was a gift fund, and this is the first reference to such fund, E.V.E.R! Additionally how much does it cost for a Facebook acknowledgement? Exactly…. I thought it sounded made up too.

My Grandma Nancy came out for the 4th of July. I had expectations of being showered by gifts and goodies as you would expect by a Grandmother. I am to say…. Disappointed? Instead of gifts, I was purchased a new leash, harness, and collar. Uhm, these are not gifts grandmother (note the formal tone). Additionally, she had chocolate cake, and gave me NONE of it. I am kind of wondering why she even came? My mother tried to explain that sometimes you get what you need for gifts. When she was growing up, her sisters birthday was in May, and she always got a swimsuit, but so did Mom and her other sister, so I guess you couldn’t really count it as a present? My Moms birthday was in late August and she always got school clothes, as well as her sisters. My Aunt Gigi’s birthday was in December and her gifts were always ‘part of her xmas present’ too. My head is still spinning try to figure out how this is related to me, the new harness, or the chocolate cake at all.

My Dad is away right now, and my next weigh in is when he gets home. My mother claims she needs him to do it, as she can’t weigh me on her own.

Next time I hope to be able to clear up the question on my religious or birthday beliefs. I will have an update on my 10lb, uhg, ehm, 13 lb summer. Also I hope to share with you a list of items and gifts I have received, hopefully some of them edible.