Health & Fitness
Don't Ask Me, I Just Live Here
Although I’ve lived in Salem for almost my entire life, I could possibly be the worst person to ask for directions in the entire city. Not because I don’t know where things are, but because I reference almost every new location to places that are long gone.
If you understand my ancient landmark references, you are a long-time resident like me and don’t need them. But if you truly need directions, you will have no clue what the heck I’m talking about.
Where is the Salem Welcome Center? “It’s in the old Armory, you know, the one that burnt to the ground in that big fire. Right across the street from the place that Natalie Jacobson use to buy all of her clothes, not too far from where Empire’s use to be.” Where is HMA? “It’s on the other side of the overpass where that hamburger place was.”
After a blank stare, most people will simply ask, “Can you just tell me what street it’s on?”
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At which point I realize I don’t have the slightest clue. Who needs to memorize street names when you know where everything is? The only problem is, I can’t explain to anyone else how to get there.
My stand by references are: “Where the old Paramount Theatre use to be”, “Across from the old Daniel & Lowes, you know, where they would send your cash in a rocket to the 2nd floor and it would magically come back with correct change” and of course “Near the old Almy’s”.
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Included in my totally useless directions have been referencing the train station to “Where Parker Brother’s was” and telling someone to meet for a run in the common “Where the popcorn man use to stand- you know, the one who used real melted butter?” I also caught myself once explaining the location of Forest River Park by saying “It’s at the end of the street near that Salem State intersection where Friendly’s use to be, you know, with the delicious vanilla Fribbles.”
At which point it dawns on me that while I don’t know the exact street addresses of these long gone places, I am clearly still emotionally connected to them.Which should come as a surprise to absolutely no one.
Realizing my directions are all based on relics and memories, I decide I need to get more up to date, and maybe even check out the street signs in my travels.
”Do you know where the new Honeydew in Salem will be opening?” I was asked. “On Canal Street” I stated proudly.
“You know, near where the old Alyce’s Ice Cream stand use to be. Boy do I miss that place.”
Sigh.
